How to CHANGE ANY BEHAVIOR You Want (Starting TODAY) Part 3

“A gentle answer turns away wrath, but harsh word stirs up anger.”   

Proverbs 15:1

Many of us suffer from a bad temper.  We have one, or live with someone who does.  We hurt, or we get hurt.

Today it ends!

Solomon received his wisdom directly from God!  We’ll put his divinely wise words in the mini map formula:

1.       IF you answer gently, THEN you will turn away intense anger.  The implication:  THEREFORE, answer gently.

2.       Can you do it?  YES.  Solomon is telling you how to do it, if you choose to do so.

3.       Is it worth it?  YOU KNOW IT IS!  You know how much regret you have from losing your temper, or how much pain you’ve felt when someone lost his or her temper with you.

I used to think this verse only focused on “the other person.”  I imagined talking to a man with a bad temper, or a woman whose words are venom.  I saw myself answering her gently, responding to him softly, and deescalating their anger as a result.  This is true, yet God showed me something else.

The primary person’s anger I’m dealing with is my own!  IF I answer gently, THEN I will turn away MY OWN WRATH!  But IF I answer harshly, THEN I will stir up MY OWN ANGER!

Do you see it!?

In other words, if my own gentle answer leaves me livid, how can I be confident it will calm the other livid person!?

So the beauty in God’s wisdom to Solomon is in how you can change your own temper by changing the mini map of cause and effect in your own mind.  Before, you used to feel like this:  IF  I encounter this person and situation, THEN I’m going to LOSE IT!  THEREFORE, when you have the encounter, YOU LOSE IT!  Or you believe IF I give this woman a piece of my mind, THEN I’ll feel better.  THEREFORE, you let her have it! 

But do you REALLY feel better?  Perhaps at that moment, until you calm down later and realize the damage you’ve done; to yourself and her.

If you want to stop doing this damage, or any other damage:

1.       Be reborn of the Spirit.

2.       Be focused on the Spirit.

This is the ultimate change, and the ultimate way to experience every change. 

You can do it!

It is worth it!